Tuesday, August 27, 2013

People Without Papers: Dalin Esparzo, Interview #1

A Brief Introduction
My main objective on the border is to create a documentary film with the aim of raising awareness of migration issues in the United States by illustrating the human side of migration. This is the translated, consolidated and in no other form altered version of a 30-minute interview which I conducted and filmed for this project. The film is still in the filming/structuring phase.
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The Lady from Honduras
My name is Dalin Esparzo and I am 29 years old. I come from the area of Olancho in the city of Catacomas, Honduras. I actually live on a ranch called "San Marcos. I had a beauty shop.
I grew up in a home where there was a lot of violence; my father beat me.
I have sisters and three brothers. The violence that we lived through, because of my father, united us.
My sisters and brothers left home when they were between 13-15 years old, when I left I was 13.
We didn't all leave together, but we would keep meeting up with each other as we traveled.
My sisters were in the capitol, Tegucigalpa. So I escaped the house and found them.
I knocked door to door walking the city asking for work.
It wasn't easy.
I worked as a maid when I was 13 and was exploited without pay for about 6 months. I was almost 14 years old when I left.
I used false papers from an 18 year old and was able to get work.
My name was Maria Eloisa.
I worked in an underwear factory for "Victoria's Secret" for 5 years. I worked 12-14 hours a day; they left me all alone.
It was a lot of pressure for a 14 year old.
At the age of 15, I hung out with people who were not good. They got me drunk and then raped me.
I met the man who raped me after I left my parents house.
He was 28.
I have 3 of his children.
My father, being the way he was, called up the man who got me pregnant and said to him "you have to come get her and take her with you!".
I had to live with the person who raped me for two years.
After I separated with him I found out I was pregnant with my twins and I was alone.
He came to the U.S.
In February he was deported. He is now in Honduras but not with our children.
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I have 4 children.
My daughter, Alejandra, is 13. I have 10 year old twins, Oscar and Roge; they look very much alike and are a little mischievous; you can imagine- they are twin boys! I also have a 2 year old daughter, Dana.
They are very polite, good kids.
I was the only one raising them so I tried to give them a good childhood. I was a good mother to the best of my abilities.
I was their friend as well as their mother.
We have a good relationship and now they are with my sister.
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I have come to Mexico 4 times and been deported 4 times from Piedras Negras.
This time I came on the 1st of June from Honduras.
We can't enter legally to Mexico. We are undocumented since we get to the border; the same process as to cross the U.S. but I haven't crossed the U.S. yet so I can't compare.
The truth is that the pass through Mexico for us Central Americans is much more difficult than for any other country.
We walk a lot... 17 hours or up to 7 days to get around the Mexican border.
I have more fear of being deported by Mexican officials than by U.S. officials because all the U.S. will do is deport you.
In Mexico, the ones who find you are delinquents; gangsters like Zetas or Salvatruchas; criminals. If you don't pay them they will kill you.
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We have to travel by train.
At each station Mara charged me $100 to travel on the train.
Mara are gangs made up of Hondurans, Salvadoreans and Mexicans. Mara kills but they are not as powerful as the Mafia.
They take advantage of us. The ones who can't pay go back home or stay in southern states of Mexico.
We cannot just buy a train ticket; we are undocumented and will be reported and deported.
You have to catch the train while it is running. It is difficult.
The train station guards will let you on while it's stopped if you pay them 400 pesos and then...
...How do I say this?
They ask for sex in exchange for certain benefits.
There are always people willing to protect you but for the price of sex. The machinists will say "I'll take you in the room and you don't have to deal with the criminals".
But he is another criminal.
You have to deal with one or the other.
So we were always paying...
...You don't have to risk your life.
This is the life on the train.
This train starts in the state of Tabasco to go up north. There are around 700 people.
You travel with people who drink and do drugs. We would watch how they would fall off the train while playing around high or drunk; many lose their lives.
It is not a nice trip.
However, as long as you are paying, you keep moving up north little by little.
I traveled by cargo train for 27 days, but in Mazatlan we were assaulted and thrown off.
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After we got kicked off the train in Mazatlan, we came to Nogales with a supposed guide who found us a coyote that said he would help us cross the border.
They tell you it's a good coyote that has taken other family members safely.
In our town, generally, the good coyotes are known- the ones that take people to their destination well and alive.
You can't trust anyone.
But at least you know their families and they know yours, so you know how to find them.
Once you are there everything is different; they trick you.
The first 2 days the coyote asked us for $700 to pay off the mafia and then we were supposed to take off.
5 days passed.
He spent the money on drugs like cocaine, beer and marijuana... in the same apartment where he had us all.
There are guns and guards and you can't leave.
We were 17 people.
I asked for money to go to the pharmacy and one of the armed guards was following me.
Once I got to the pharmacy, I went in the front door and out the back. I ran about 3 blocks and jumped into the first taxi I found.
I could not tell the police about the experience because it would mean risking my life.
When I escaped there were 13 people left.
3 men from El Salvador had left because they said they wanted to go back to El Salvador and one girl who broke her teeth when we were assaulted in Mazatlan was being treated by Red Cross.
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When I first came to the shelter, honestly, I was terrified.
I didn't even come out to the patio for the first 4 days. I was scared of all the other migrants.
They would ask me "are you going to come out today?" and I would say "no way! I'm fine!".
Maria saw me crying and she told me she would take me to a more secure area.
The shelter is a very safe, peaceful place where you can get psychological therapy and recuperate from the trauma so you can reconstruct your life.
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I will cross into the U.S.
I will leave Nogales. I can't cross here for fear of the same mafia that kidnapped me before.
I'll travel by truck and find a coyote.
It's the only way.
I'm afraid of the desert but not because of U.S. Border Patrol. If the U.S. gets you they just deport you back home and that's fine.
I have heard there's a lot of drugs and mafia.
If bad people get you, you can be killed, raped and who knows what else? You can also be kidnapped for ransom and instead of helping your family out they end up having to give everything they have.
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I want to get to the U.S and work for at least 3-5 years.
I will look for work first, I have friends who are already in the U.S. working.
I just want to finish building my house in Honduras so I can have my own business.
I don't think it is right...
...The people who migrate, Central Americans, Mexicans, etc., experience the most economic hardships and if they go to the U.S. it is because they want to help. Like we say; "we don't want to take anything, we are giving our time and hard work".
I think that as a Honduran, the problem is the people who migrate go to work and then enjoy the new life and don't want to return.
If we had a 5 year permit there would be opportunity for everyone.
5 years to go and make the most of your time in the U.S.
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I have a 50% chance of making it to my destination, 25% chance of being deported and 25% chance of dying.
But we always say...
"We prefer to die fighting than to die of hunger in our own country."
My name is Danil Esparzo and my American Dream is to get there, work for 3-5 years and then go back to Honduras to perform my role as a mother.
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Contributors:
Kino Border Initiative, el Comedor: KBI supported Danil during her time in Nogales as they have with countless women in her situation. They provided space for the interview at el Comedor.
Maria Casanova: Maria (aforementioned by Danil in the interview) is a student from Guadalajara who spent her summer volunteering with KBI. She had an array of responsibilities, most noteworthy was running the women's shelter. Maria organized the interview and translated my questions to Danil. Without Maria this interview would never have happened.
AnaLuisa Morales: AnaLuisa translated the interview, using an audio file, from Spanish to English and constructed the original English transcript with time code. AnaLuisa will continue to play an essential role in the creation of this documentary.
Catherine Born: Catherine is my fellow SCCF intern. She translated much of Danil's questions from Spanish to English during the interview.
Peg Bowden: Peg Bowden is the activist, writer and SCCF intern-coordinator who introduced me to el Comedor and has avidly supported me and this project.

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